Ao no Exorcist, I love you!^^ You rock and I love the OSTs, OP & ED as well! :D
Right, back to topic. *Puts on rectangular black-rimmed spectacles with a no-joke face* (Psst, did I just act like Yukio Okumura?) *Fangirl giggle*
Some questions have been making me question my gender... Just kidding! I am straight (as far as I know... =o) but I was just wondering as usual. xD
1. Is it necessary to change the hairstyle once in awhile?
or
1. Is it boring to keep the same hairstyle all the time?
To me, I do not think it is boring to keep the same hairstyle all the time but (Yes, almost every sentence has a 'but'. =x) my pretty friend told me months ago that it's really boring to look the same for a long time. We got to this topic because she was talking about her friend who cut short her hair and ever since then, never keeps it long anymore. So my pretty friend asked, "Don't you just think that it is so boring to look like that all the time?" I have seen her friend and I thought she looked cute, cheerful and pretty. Seen her quite a few times and her look never bores me to death. Does this mean that I am the one with a problem? @.@
Come on, realistically, not everyone of us can afford a change of hairstyle. *Raises hand* I cannot say I am poor and neither can I say I am rich. In short, I come from outer space an average family. I do not want to have to keep throwing money at all these hairstyle maintenance... I could have used it all on violin-related matters, books, school-related matters and uh, not to mention EMERGENCIES? After all, most of the hairstyles won't last forever and I feel bad having to disturb my parents to get me to the hair salon (and pay for the haircut).
One more thing, "hair salon" is a foreign word to me in a way because I don't think I have ever been to one in my entire life (as in, never been there with the reason that has anything to do with my own hair). Please do not take this personally - even I myself desire a nice hairstyle that stops my hair from being so frizzy and stubborn!
2. Why do girls have so many shoes, clothes, bags (and the list goes on) and still buy more?Oho, what a shame! I myself am a girl and yet I am the one questioning other girls out there. No offence though. This is just me being curious. ;)
Alright, before you all start shooting me or wanting to kill me in my sleep, I admit I have my own clothes and bags that I never use. Not saying I keep buying them though (this is the truth - true story ;D) Firstly, as much as I hate to admit, I have a strict family who watches whatever I buy and do (and say).
As for clothes, there are about 2 tops and a pair of long pants that I sorta regret having. This is all thanks to my stupidity early this year. I was trying hard again to be a normal girl. Of course, my mother nagged but in the end, I got away with those 2 tops.
Now, if I ever wear them (which I do not want to ever again), I'll feel so goddamn ugly and exposed. Just to clarify a few things, they are not the usual whorish or slutty clothes. They're considered goddamn decent compared to what you may have thought it to be but I guess I just wasn't used to having more of my shoulders exposed.
About bags, *laughs weakly* I have quite a few but they weren't mine in the first place and they cannot even store all the stuff I bring along. Even if they could store all the stuff I usually bring when I go out, they would not guarantee the safety of my stuff. xD
Being quite a perfectionist here, I make sure my book(s) - Yes, I bring a book or two with me to read whether I get to read much or not - do not have torn pages, folded pages, dog ears or 'wrinkles'. (Alas, "Where Rainbows End" by Cecelia Ahern was not in a really good condition because my mom flung it across the room to a dark, dirty and dusty spot when she got mad at me for not studying properly for exams back when I was 14. The book's now slightly blackish but still readable.)
A few months back, my old sling bag just couldn't support me anymore. I just have more things to bring along for "emergencies" to satisfy my endless "what ifs" and some of the new books were big, heavy and freaking thick.
Thus, the search for a more suitable bag started. I was looking for a black sling bag that's not too big, not too small and rectangular. It did not have to necessarily have many compartments. Simplicity is much appreciated just so long the books can fit in. I also wanted it to be made of fabric (Leather smells and cheap imitation ones just tear real easily). The sling bag better last for years too! =/
My family helped me search for that 'miracle and magical' sling bag that might not even exist or live up to my expectations. Finally, I stumbled across my "new fated partner" that's capable of keeping me company long enough. It took me weeks to consider but it was literally love at first sight the moment my eyes stopped to gaze at that bag.
I happily transferred the things into the new bag after happily purchasing it. In case you're curious, it's a messenger bag. ;P Hope ya don't face palm after knowing my preference. Hehe~ The new bag could even hold my fraying, fading, old, stained and worn out bag. If you also wondered what was it that I bring with me all the time, they're definitely my book(s), spectacle box, nail clipper, a wallet (hate to disappoint you but I do not bring much with me), comb and a cell phone (That is if I even remember to bring it along. xD). Yes, *waves a hand while hiding a smile* not the girlish person who brings make-up.
Have no idea since when but I became so paranoid that I have to ALWAYS grab my bag and make sure the zip didn't magically move an inch. =/ This is not normal, is it? =S
3. Why is it wrong to hate socializing?
Since I am not your typical girlish person, it is not weird for me to hate going out with people. I just hate attending parties and hanging out with people. Is this a disadvantage of not being allowed to attend parties and joining outings?
Not exaggerating but I have my heart in my mouth every single time I ask for permission to simply go to a friend's house or hang out with my friends. Back in elementary school, I was somewhat frequently invited to birthday parties and outings at shopping centres. Most of the time, I was not allowed to attend any of them. I stayed at home playing by myself most of the time. Luckily, I wasn't really bitter about it but sometimes I can't help wishing I was given more freedom. Friends eventually got the message and stopped inviting me.
Now, in secondary school, I am a teenage girl who hates socializing almost more than anything else in the world. That's not how AvPD came about though. AvPD started many years back. *smiles ruefully* I still get invited to some events but hardly, which is good in its own way. Because of that, I do not experience getting excited about shopping for a new outfit to attend an evening or night event. Here are 2 advantages I can think of about not being able to attend these events: I save time and money to do something else I feel more productive accomplishing.
Hmm, did I just stray far from the actual topic? xD Sorry, people~ So really, why is it wrong to be an anti-social? Why is it wrong to hate mixing with strangers? Why is it wrong to not want to make friends? Why is it wrong to want to be quiet and just blend in with the crowd? Why is it wrong to keep a low profile?
I truly feel the most comfortable when I am alone or with my family. Friends, close friends, best friends, I love most of you all but I just feel so hideous and stupid that I do not want to be with you all. I feel that I am not worthy of being with any of you all. So, thank you all for staying with me, whether you know how I really feel deep inside or not. I like to do my own stuff looking like a complete goof in my own house. xD Well, who doesn't?
It's really bothersome to have to be the civilized, polite and cheerful person with no problems out there. I often forget to greet my friends' family. I usually just fake a smile (like most times) and nod to acknowledge their presence. I gave up calling out "auntie" or "uncle" after reading so many books stating that some people just hate being called that because they would feel old.
Besides, I may be able to speak loud but with the lack of confidence, I feel that I would screw things up by being too loud or having a shaky and unstable voice. This is not a joke or excuse... The last time I was forced to read a passage aloud, I stuttered and messed up words to the extent that I felt like giving up. I thought I was actually dyslexic! *gives a look of horror* As expected, the students all laughed but my dear friend gave me a look that said, "What's up?".
To hide my humiliation, all I could do was laugh at myself even though I hate being laughed at. Hate being ridiculed. I also absolutely hate it when people laugh at me whenever I am angry or being serious. Really makes me feel like giving that person a slap. Hmph! If not a slap, I'd pinch both cheeks of that person and make 'em swell until he/she can smile no more. Maybe I'll even add a bruised eye to complete a simple HUMOROUS look that cartoon characters make after getting beaten up. (>.>)
As usual, I could only tolerate and pretend I'm cool with everything. Why is it that people can get away with an argument (may it be a short or long one; slight or bad one) and whenever I do decide to explode, they stop talking to me forever? This ALWAYS happens! What irks me more is when my other friends or family members side with them.
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Gonna end the questions here. As you can see, I only had 3 questions that I could remember. xD
Lately, I do not feel like talking to anyone online. Problem? xD or more like Does that make me an anti-social?
Whatever it is, take care and have fun, everyone! ^^ For your information (whether you give a damn or not) I am not bitter or angry after the last few sentences. =P
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